meditation stories
meditation stories
How has meditation changed your life?
I am studying Buddhism and practicing meditation. I would like to hear your stories of how meditation has changed your life. Did you see the world more clearly now?
In 2005, I worked as a correctional officer. I became more and more angry and bitter. I would lash out at his colleagues, family members, and so on. I would wear this environment at home with me, and I could not let go. A particularly difficult night (my newspaper describes as a very bad day), I had a book with me on Buddhism, and I had the opportunity to navigate through it. I read about the Four Noble Truths, and I could see there: This is suffering! Enough of the pieces that I decided to try Buddhism. This will only be temporary – to see if I could get a glimpse of the anger and hatred, and see if I could find a way to overtake. So I started very basic meditation practice for short periods of time. Nothing fantasy. I joined an online group Dhamma and asked some questions, got some feedback on meditation and ethics and so on. For about half an hour a day, I practice mindfulness of breathing or the charnel floor contemplation. I do not see any major changes at first, and only with hindsight, I see what I was looking at. I took precepts in July 2005, and I left my job in corrections in March 2006 because I could see how the "Environment has been destructive. I found a better job that does not require violence, even if it has been a decrease salary. At some point, and I can only assume this is a recent development, I could see how I understand the illusion Control: I want it that way, and no other way. If it were otherwise, I would be angry. So I started to practice in another way: I started practicing just acknowledging the way things are, without trying to take control them: "The meeting is like this today." "The work is like that." Slowly, the restitution of things that I really control. Gradually, I began to notice an opening, a spacious quality of mind. My meditations have become more peaceful. I could sit and watch the thoughts and feelings floating, whatever the content, without too worked up about it. Meditation is exactly that way right now. It has not be anything else. Then I started noticing how many things I really enjoy: sunsets, sitting near water, autumn days, a fresh wind, sunrises, small moments of intimacy and connection with others. I started to write it as an act of vigilance. I started noticing more and more (that's where I am now … notice all these things that make me happy, joy, peace, etc..) Anger has lost much of its grip. I know myself a bit more now: what is really my response to things, my thoughts, as opposed to someone else's feelings and thoughts. I can rest easy that. More importantly, there is nothing to defend. I still caught in the illusion sometimes, but all I have to do is to return to the center: "It like this. It is what it is now. "My wife thinks that the change is radical. It can connect with me now in a way she never could before. We are both happy for her, although I am yet to explore, learn and discover.
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